Facing Your Fear of Being Visible: Part 1 ~ Standing Out

In this blog series, I will be sharing snippets from my personal  journey into the fears of being visible ... of standing out!

Julia

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~Challenges that arise do so in order to push you out of your comfort zone.~ Antari


For those who fear being visible -- of standing out ... the challenges can be more than a little uncomfortable--they can be downright crippling at times!   

Over the years, despite, or rather in spite of, my numerous personal challenges ... I've managed to acquire the reputation of being personable,  out-going and out-spoken.    A real people person.  A natural born actress whose stage is anywhere she is standing.  Who ... when she walks into a room, brings her own spotlight!

I'll admit that over the years,  I've developed  this knack for entertaining folks wherever I find myself.   Never having a loss for words, I  can hold a conversation with anyone. And I do mean ... anyone.

I wasn't always like that mind you.  In fact, looking at me now, you would have never guessed that I was once a painfully shy, over-weight, cross-eyed, near-sited little tomboy with a speech impediment and stutter.

I'm still a bit chunky and near-sited, but  thanks to a great optometrist, I'm not as cross-eyed as I once was.    And countless hours of private practice, along with a handful of a few kind supporters,  my stuttering and speech impediment finally came to an end.  Well ... almost!  It still comes out when I get excited!

In spite of all my accomplishments, I still carry this one little secret.  It's a secret only a select number of people actually know about me.    

I hate standing out in a crowd!   I really hate being seen!  Being Visible.  Being in the spotlight!!!

Rather hard to believe isn't it?  However, many of my close friends can tell you of the numerous times I had come close to being famous only to immediately pull away.  While fame has never been my goal, it is  something that follows me like a stray dog wherever I go.

Naturally there are valid reasons for my fears -- which will be revealed over the next few installments  of this blog series.  

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A walking contradiction. This was how my high school English teacher, Miss Hawkins,  described me.  I still remember that conversation she and I had one day before class.   She knelt down in front of my desk and whispered ...  I finally figured you out.   You're a walking contradiction!  But I want you to know -- I want you to remember -- how very proud I am of you for facing your fears like that!  That shows real class sweetie! And you're one classy lady!  I hope and pray you never lose that!  The world needs more people like you!

Have to tell you -- that scared me a little bit. Okay! It scared the crap out of me!  But even so,  I think that's what kept me going all this time.

It really helps when you know someone believes in you.

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Looking over my life, I clearly see that  I am still a walking contradiction. 

On the one hand ... I thoroughly enjoy sharing my knowledge with people.  On the other hand ... having to interact with  people -- especially in person-- unnerves me .

Naturally -- like many of you -- I have my reasons for feeling this way.  And like most of you, I have had my share of opposition.   And working through that opposition can (and oftentimes does) sends you reeling back a few steps.

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Time and time again, I have been met with the ill-informed opinions  of people, the harsh and cruel judgments they pass, their lies, and their overall pettiness.   Being publicly slandered by these same types of people didn't help my situation either!

The truth is ... these are nothing more than excuses.  Poor ones to boot!   And I say that because, I am reminded of some rather outstanding people all throughout history, who had to endure similar situations and experiences.  They kept on keeping on! They plowed through all the freeze dried bullshit of opinionated people and their lies, judgments and ill-conceived notions of what should and should not be.   And most, if not all of them, had been brutally slandered!

Whenever I find myself pulling back, I keep thinking about some of them.   Then the question pops up... where would we all be had they given in to their fear of standing out -- of being visible?

Jesus,  Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, The Wright Brothers, Alexander Grahm Bell,  Henry Ford, Martin Luther King, Jack & Bobby Kennedy, and a host of others.  Had they all listened to the nay sayers of their day.... if they  had all given into their individual fears of being visible-- Of standing out -- where would we all be?

Well I think you can guess!

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Like all of those who came before us ... we too have something to offer the world!  Other wise, we would not be here!  While it would be nice  not to have to face opposition of any kind -- it is to be expected.  And of course, keeping in mind,  any challenges that arises--do so in order to push us out of our comfort zone.    Right?  Right!

The fear of being visible -- of standing out -- didn't stop any of these great teachers, leaders and inventors.  Yea, it may have slowed them down a time or two -- but what set them apart from everyone else -- was their persistence in working through those fears! 

By following their example, I have stepped out of the proverbial closet.  Faced my fears -- and continue to work through them.  Baby steps every inch of the way!  But they are steps ... nonetheless!   And I have made a vow to help others do the same!  Because I know ... there are people out there ... just like me ... who need a helping hand!  Who need someone who has "been there-- done that!"

No ... it ain't easy!  Not by a long shot!  Then again .... no one said it would be!  But I am a firm believer, that we can over come anything ... once we set our mind to it!  And the best part is ... we don't have to do it all  alone!

"If all we have is each other ... then we're already one step ahead of the opposition!"    ~Virginia Lane Moore, my maternal grandmother.

(Excerpts from The ZEN of Duct Tape: An Empress Is Born )

Embrace ALL that you are!

For you ARE ... ALL that there is! 

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Known as The Empress of the Known & Unknown Universes™ and The Diva of Duct Tape, Julia has made it her personal mission to put Reality back into Spirituality™. Julia sets out to assist people in expanding their conscious awareness through her rather unique and personal take on the human experience. 

In the style of Erma Bombeck, Julia utilizes her own brand of humor and down to earth demeanor to get her messages across in an all so delightful way. 

 

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