Six Things To Practice During 2014: Addictions To The Past

We  are living in an age of re-educating ourselves.  Which is  the main reason I began this Blog.   With knowledge comes understanding, and with understanding comes healing. 

Over the next 6 weeks I will be covering Six Things To Practice During 2014.  But before going into all that, I believe it important that we come into an understanding as to why we dwell on the past.  And too, how it effects the brain and subsequently creates an addiction that leads to other outside addictive behaviors.     

Dwelling on the past is, for many, an addiction.     But unlike the other types of addictions we know about, such as drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling and so on,  our addiction to the past is still pretty much seen as a harmful past-time.  After doing some research on the matter, it is clear that Medical Science is working diligently to connect emotional dis-ease with outside physical ailments.  

Following is just a few examples.  And as with anything you find on this Blog, I ask that you take what rings true for you, and simply leave the rest!

Namaste!

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My mother spent over 90% of her life dwelling on the past.   Nearly every conversation with her would be about something that happened to her years prior.  Most of the events took place long before I was even born.  And many of the people she spoke of were complete strangers to me.  But that didn't stop her from recounting specifics of situations that took place 40, 50 and 60 years ago, giving you the time, date and weather conditions!  A  I shit you not!     

Interestingly enough, whenever anyone asked my mother what she did the day before, her mind would go blank!    

Even though she could recall certain current situations, my mother would always (and I mean always) find a way to integrate past events into it!  It was if she was stuck on this damn never ending loop.  No matter how hard you would try to keep her focused on the present, she would just go right back to something that happened to her in the past.   Granted, some of the things that happened were pretty traumatic.  But she had happy times too.  Sadly, she chose to focus more on the bad than the good.   And sadder still, not only did her habitual trips to the past make her unbearable to be around, it also forced her into several psychotic break downs.  It was heartbreaking to know that her unwillingness to fully live in the present prevented her from enjoying life.   

  

Unfortunately, my mother’s nasty little habit of dwelling on the past is not some isolated anomaly.    For a vast number of people, dwelling on the past is a life-time commitment. 

Some who have studied the human condition have concluded that dwelling on the past could be signs of addiction.     

The chemicals triggered in your brain, like any substance abuse, when used for the wrong purpose and over-used, the effects can be, and are, devastating and debilitating.  In many cases, it can also create physical ailments like heart disease, and ultimately…death.

The following are a few examples of such addictions:

Emotional addiction:  needing sympathy and/or attention.  A need to feel alive.  Fear of being hurt or fear of constant danger.  And in more extreme cases, addiction to pain. 

  

Chemicals in the brain that are triggered:  Adrenaline and cortisol.   Reliving certain situations increases adrenaline.  (And yes, there are adrenaline junkies!)    Cortisol governs fear; its primary purpose is to help us avoid hurtful situations and danger.   

Emotional addiction:   can also mean the need to recapture those feelings of security, confidence, comfort and love.  

Chemicals in the brain that are triggered:  Endorphins, dopamine, Serotonin, Oxytocin

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Six Signs You Suffer from an Addiction to the Past
1. You Constantly Talk About the Past and the Way Things Used to Be
2. You Resist Change
3. You Continually Fail to Plan for a Better Future
4. You Argue for the Past that Things Used to Be Better
5. You've allowed Relationships to Become Stale, Uninteresting and Without Passion
6. You have physically or mentally peaked

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So why do we dwell on the past so much?  Rehashing over and over in our minds what we could have /should have said and done?   Reliving memories that are, for the most part, painful and emotionally damaging?  

We’ll cover these questions in the next article.

Sources:  

Psychology Today 

Huffington Post Healthy Living

Woof! Meow! Tweet! The Benefits Of Having Pets In Our MS Life

Article by  Christie Germans

Dog, cat, chinchilla, hamster, ferret, fish, bearded dragon, parakeet, pig, monkey – whatever your choice, pets really make us feel good, better even, as we live with chronic illness and disability. Not only can they provide physical assistance, they also warm our hearts and make living with MS a bit easier.

I am reminded of this as the winter temperatures drop and my cat, Hans, now cuddles more. (Yes, even in California, it gets cold. It dropped to the high 30’s the other night, which is cold for us, really, really cold. Brrrr!). There is nothing better than a good snuggle with Hans to warm me up. On the days I do not feel well, Hans just seems to pick up on this and cuddles with me even more, even closer. How wonderful this is as he distracts me from the pain I feel, the burning in my legs, the extreme fatigue I battle.

And, there is more to it than just the snuggles. Having pets in our lives has a wide range of benefits. They help us cope, lift us from feelings of loneliness and depression and get us outside for a bit of sunshine and exercise.

Top 7 benefits of having pets in our MS life:

1. Pets keep us company. Living with a companion animal can help ease feelings of isolation. Having a buddy by your side can make such a big difference in minimizing the feelings of loneliness. Even if the conversation is only one way…

2. Pets can help us fight depression. Taking care of pets (walking them, grooming them, petting them, playing with them) takes you out of yourself and helps you feel better. Our pets’ love is unconditional so, good day or bad, they have a lot to give us. Well, that is unless your name is Hans who, when he doesn’t get the treats he persistently begs for in the morning, may not be spreading the love quite as far.

3. Pets give us a sense of support and pleasure. Our life with MS should focus more on the good parts, not the un-fun stuff, right? Having pets makes us feel good. They’re cute and they’re sweet and they’re funny and they’re snuggly. All good stuff that makes living with MS a bit more bearable.

4. Pets get us outside when we might not otherwise. When we walk Spot, we sometimes meet others along the way, stopping for conversation, watching dogs do the funny things they do. It’s a great social outlet. Plus, there’s the added benefit of soaking some of that sun vitamin!

5. Pets calm us and relieve our anxiety. This is a big one for me as I am slightly neurotic. Hans is chill so he keeps me chill, not an easy feat. Om.

6. Pets help minimize stress levels – this is huge for us, as stress is often the culprit when our symptoms flare up.

7. Pets help us improve our physical fitness. After all, exercise is important for MSers and, taking your dog for short walks or tossing their favorite toy in the backyard, helps keep us moving. This includes basic stretching. I can’t tell you how many times Hans watches us at home, with keen interest and curiosity, as we stretch or do some yoga. Eventually, he gets right on the floor with us to do a bit of stretching himself. Kitty Yoga. Hilarious!

Our animals really enhance our lives, don’t they? And, they help us a lot during difficult times, during those painful moments with MS. Nudging their wet noses against us for a pet or cuddling with us after an injection or keeping us company while we hang out in bed battling fatigue. These pet moments make MS matter less and make life with MS a little bit easier.

How about you? Tell us about your pet and how your life is better because of your pet. I’m sure you have a story you’d love to share and we’d love to hear about the healing power of your pets.

Source:  Multiple Sclerosis Site

Smoker Numbers Edge Close To One Billion

Although smoking is becoming less popular in many parts of the world, the total number of smokers is growing, global figures reveal.

In 2012, 967 million people smoked every day compared with 721 million in 1980, data from 187 countries shows.

The rise is linked to population growth, researchers told JAMA.

With the Earth's population having more than doubled in the last 50 years to seven billion, there are simply more people to take up the habit.

Several large countries, including Bangladesh, China and Russia, have seen increasing numbers of inhabitants take up smoking in recent years, the figures show.

Indeed, some of the highest smoking rates are now seen in the developing world, according to the JAMA report from the University of Washington's Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation (IHME) in the US.

But global smoking prevalence - the proportion of the world's population that smokes - has gone down.

Around three in 10 men (31%) and one in 20 women (6%) now smoke daily compared with four in 10 men (41%) and one in 10 women (10%) in 1980.

In terms of countries with the highest prevalence of tobacco use, East Timor tops the list with 61% of its population smoking every day.

To read the rest of the story, click HERE

Dear Alex:

You've always insisted on doing things your  way. And the results of doing it your way have always proven disastrous for not only yourself, but for everyone involved.

Contrary to what you may think or believe,  no one forced you into making the choices you'e made and continue to make.   No one has forced you into living a life of misery.  Your situation is the combination of insisting  on doing things your way (even though it never works out for you) and from the poor choices you've made and continue to make.  

With respect to Shelby.  Yes, me and the rest of this family dropped the fucking ball.  I take responsibility for my part.  And My Part Alone!      I’m not taking responsibility for anyone else’s reactions, actions, in-actions, etc. Not my job!  I’m not taking responsibility for Tara, Bobbie Lynn, Lloyd, Frankie or Betty and their individual and collective failures to take any necessary actions.    Again, not my job!

Again, for emphasis, I can, and will, only take responsibility for me!  No one Else! 

I’m not taking responsibility for you.  And I’m certainly not taking responsibility for Ashley!  

I will remind you again and again, however many times it takes, that you’re the one that brought that person into our lives.  You knew how Ashley was and is.    You know her violent tendencies. She's has, on more than one occasion,  beat your ass into the ground.  And yet you brought her around Shelby.  You had numerous options.  But you refused to take them. 

So as far as I am concerned, both you and Tara share responsibility for what occurred!      And YES!  Tara, IS  MAINLY RESPONSIBLE!  But as she has told you, has told me and has told numerous others countless times...she just could not be bothered!     So it fell on you!

At least Ashley is in jail paying for her actions!    In truth, both you and Tara belong in jail right along with Ashley!  Tara in particular and most especially.  Not just  for thinking she could just toss her mother to the curb like yesterday's trash, but for being a thief and liar. 

And you for just being a dumb ass!

And by the way,  my  conscience is clear.   I did try to get Shelby help.  It was shortly after mother died.  But guess what?   I was told to mind my own fucking business!  I was told I had no legal standing. I  was told to stand down!   So I did.  


Alex, you can sit there and feel sorry for yourself all you want. But all your self-pity isn't going to change the past.  It's not going to change anyone who doesn't want,  or choose, to change.  But most importantly,  your little hissy fits and pity parties aren't going to change the truth of what is!

FYI:  Hissy fits and pity parties do not change the Truth!

And the truth is, you've made bad choices,  you continue to make even more bad choices each day.  And you still insist on doing everything your way.  Even though it always ends badly for you and anyone involved!

You can sit there and assign blame all day long.  You can waste away the hours drudging  up the past of what was said, done, etc. But you know what Alex?  Assigning Blame does not change the Truth!

And by the way Alex.  Everyone who knows you knows the real reason you went to live with  Shelby.    You’re not fooling anyone pal!  Well maybe yourself.  But no one else!  So you can get off your high horse now!   You've lived rent free for how many years now?  Going straight from living off my mother to living off Shelby.  So give it a rest!

FYI:  Putting on a Pretense does not change the Truth!

You see Alex,  I no  longer have this desire to be a part of such dramas.   I've wasted enough time and energy as it is.       I'm too old, too tired and just plain too sick of living in a reality where it's nothing but a continuous flow of freeze dried bullshit.  But I needed to get this off my chest.  I needed to air out this booger so I could move on and away from you, this asshole family, and all of your dramas!

And too, I wanted to pass on this message.  So here's the bottom line.  

You can keep doing things your way until the cows come home; and you can keep making all the bad choices you can come up with.  I mean, after all, doing things your way, making shitty choices has worked out so wonderfully for you thus far!  Right?  


Or 

You can pull your head out of your ass and try something that actually resembles some form of sanity!

Here's a Hint:  Try making a different fucking choice and see where it takes you!    Start with pulling your enormous size head out of your ass!

The Devil's Prized Possesion

Thought You Might Enjoy This!

One day,  Satan was having a sale of his wares. On display, and offered for sale, were the rapier of jealousy, the dagger of fear, and the strangling noose of hatred, each with its own high price.

But standing alone on a purple pedestal was a worn and battered wedge. This was the devil's most prized possession, for with it alone he could stay in business. It was not for sale ... it was the wedge of discouragement.

Why do you suppose the devil valued so highly, and actually would not sell, the worn and battered wedge of discouragement? Makes you think doesn't it?

He prized discouragement because of its enfeebling, demoralizing effect. Hatred, fear or jealousy may lead an immature person to act unwisely, to fight, or to run. But at least they act. Discouragement on the other hand, hurts the person more than any of these. It causes the person to sit down, pity himself or herself and do nothing.

Now this doesn't have to happen, but unfortunately it all too frequently does. Not until we realize that discouragement is often a form of self pity, do we begin to take stock of ourselves and our predicament and decide to act ... to do something that will take us out of the unpleasant situation.

The answer to discouragement then is intelligent action. Get rid of discouragement before it gets rid of you. [emphasis added]

The devil might not survive without this priceless wedge ... but we can. 


This story was one of many inspiring messages told by Earl Nightingale.  

For those unfamiliar with him, Earl Nightingale was an American motivational speaker and author, known as the "Dean of Personal Development."   He was the voice in the early 1950s of Sky King, the hero of a radio adventure series, and was a WGN radio show host from 1950 to 1956.

Today his works continue through, not only his own website, but through countless others who are carrying on Mr. Nightingale's work today.  People like Bob Proctor--who by the way, sent me the above story via daily E-mail  messages!  :-)

For more information on Earl Nightingale, please visit   http://earlnightingale.com/

Red Cross: Check on Elderly, Disabled Neighbors During Extreme Cold

The elderly are particularly vulnerable to extreme cold, and a geriatric expert is offering tips on keeping senior citizens safe.  They  produce less body heat, and hypothermia can develop even during sleep.

A good preventive step is  to make sure the elderly use extra blankets and to make sure that the temperature  where they reside is set appropriately.  Cool homes with temperatures from 60 to 65 degrees can trigger hypothermia in older people.  The thermostat should be kept at a minimum of 70 degrees for the elderly.

For the elderly, disabled, and those with special needs, the cold weather means it's harder to get to the pharmacy, shovel snow, or run to the grocery store. Joann Moore, the spokesperson for the Greater Ozarks Chapter of the American Red Cross, says now is the time to be a good neighbor, by getting out and knocking on the doors of your elderly neighbors to make sure they’re coping well.“First of all, I would recommend that you check in with them quite often to see if they do need help, [to see] if the heat is on. That’s one of the most important things, I think, because elderly people, and people who are very young, are very susceptible to hypothermia,” Moore said.

Click HERE to read entire story

Be Prepared for Major Winter Storm, Extreme Cold

Dress Warmly and Stay Dry

Dress in layers. 
Wear a hat.

• Be sure the outer layer of your clothing is tightly woven, preferably wind resistant, to reduce body-heat loss caused by wind. Wool, silk, or polypropylene inner layers of clothing will hold more body heat than cotton.

•  Stay dry—wet clothing chills the body rapidly.

•  Excess perspiration will increase heat loss, so remove extra layers of clothing whenever you feel too warm. 

• Avoid getting gasoline or alcohol on your skin while de-icing and fueling your car or using a snow blower. These materials in contact with the skin greatly increase heat loss from the body.

•  Do not ignore shivering. It’s an important first sign that the body is losing heat. Persistent shivering is a signal to return indoors. 

• Infants less than one year old should never sleep in a cold room because infants lose body heat more easily than adults.

Hypothermia

• When exposed to cold temperatures, your body begins to lose heat faster than it can be produced. 

• Prolonged exposure to cold will eventually use up your body’s stored energy. The result is hypothermia, or abnormally low body temperature. 

• Body temperature that is too low affects the brain, making the victim unable to think clearly or move well. This makes hypothermia particularly dangerous because a person may not know it is happening and won’t be able to do anything about it.

• Hypothermia is most likely at very cold temperatures, but it can occur even at cool temperatures (above 40°F) if a person becomes chilled from rain, sweat, or submersion in cold water.

• Victims of hypothermia are often (1) elderly people with inadequate food, clothing, or heating; (2) babies sleeping in cold bedrooms; (3) people who remain outdoors for long periods—the homeless, hikers, hunters, etc.; and (4) people who drink alcohol or use illicit drugs.

Recognizing Hypothermia

Warnings signs of hypothermia:

Adults:

shivering, exhaustion

confusion, fumbling hands

memory loss, slurred speech

drowsiness

Infants:

bright red, cold skin

very low energy

What to Do

If you notice any of these signs, the situation is an emergency — get medical attention immediately.

Be A Good Neighbor

A winter emergency like this is a time for all of us to be good neighbors.

We especially need to look out for the elderly. Older adults often make less body heat because of a slower metabolism and less physical activity.  

Many elderly live alone and have limited mobility…some even have no family close by. They may even have special medical needs so check in on them.

Eat and Drink Wisely

Eating well-balanced meals will help you stay warmer.

Do not drink alcoholic or caffeinated beverages—they cause your body to lose heat more rapidly. Instead, drink warm, sweet beverages or broth to help maintain your body temperature. If you have any dietary restrictions, ask your doctor.

Look Out For Pets

Bring pets inside

When you take pets outside, go with them. Don’t let them go alone.

The city has many community cats -- before starting your car, TAP on the hood.  DON'T HONK HORN! TAP on the Hood!

Cats will seek shelter in engines during cold weather.  So before starting your engines, TAP ON THE HOOD OF YOUR CAR!

Avoid Exertion

If you haven’t exercised or been very physically active, now is not the time to go out and shovel your driveway in a hurry.

Cold weather puts an extra strain on the heart.

If you have heart disease or high blood pressure, follow your doctor’s advice about shoveling snow or performing other hard work in the cold. Otherwise, if you have to do heavy outdoor chores, dress warmly and work slowly. Remember, your body is already working hard just to stay warm, so don’t overdo it.

Preventing Carbon Monoxide Poisoning

• If power outages occur, the use of alternative sources of fuel or electricity for heating, cooling, or cooking can cause carbon monoxide to build up in a home, garage, or camper and then poison the people and animals inside.

• Carbon monoxide (CO) is an odorless, colorless gas that can cause sudden illness and death if inhaled. 

• Every home should have at least one working carbon monoxide detector. The detector’s batteries should be checked twice annually, at the same time smoke detector batteries are checked. 

• Never use a gas range or oven to heat a home. 

• Never run a generator or any gasoline-powered engine inside a basement, garage, or other enclosed structure, even if the doors or windows are open, unless the equipment is professionally installed and vented. 

• Never leave the motor running in a vehicle parked in an enclosed or partially enclosed space, such as a garage.

Exposure to CO can cause loss of consciousness and death. The most common symptoms of CO poisoning are headache, dizziness, weakness, nausea, vomiting, chest pain, and confusion. People who are sleeping or who have been drinking alcohol can die from CO poisoning before ever having symptoms.