Julia K Cole

Below is a short article written by Jan Brown which was posted as a reply to my article Domestic Violence: Taking it like a Man--the Untold Story   five years ago.  My article can can be found HERE.   October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and throughout the month domestic violence advocates and the media's attention will be focused on bringing more public understanding to and promoting the eradication of men’s violence against women. However, not all intimate partner violence (IPV) fits into this neat little package. IPV against men, especially against men by their female intimate partners, has always been a hot button issue. The mere mention of male victims in a gathering of traditional domestic violence advocates creates great controversy.  While domestic violence advocates may know men are victims they insist that their victims service agencies (over 2,000 of them in the US) should focus exclusively on ending violence against wome...

Domestic Violence Awareness Month may be coming to a close at the end of October, but we must not forget that every day men, women and children seek safety and justice inside America's courts. Sadly, from New York to California, victims of domestic violence are facing a rationing of justice. Court furlough days have resulted in backlogs and delayed temporary restraining orders. Crippling budget cuts mean courts must reduce their hours of operation or close altogether. Turned away at shuttered courthouse doors, victims of domestic violence are left to fend for themselves.  In Oregon, "Jane" had to wait three days to file a Family Abuse Prevention Act Restraining Order because Friday was a designated court furlough day. In New Jersey, "Joe" sat outside a courtroom door for nearly five hours waiting to be heard while the increasing backlog of cases ultimately suspended civil and family court trials and delayed temporary restraining orders. And in Mississ...

While I was preparing an article on Domestic Violence Awareness, I came upon  a photo collage of a young woman whose face was all busted up and bloodied.  The caption of this picture read:  My boyfriend beats me up -- but I love him though! After seeing this picture, I tossed my original article in lieu of a good old fashioned rant.   ** If you are easily offended ... NOW is a good time to close out this blog** For any of you who are currently in a relationship where your significant other is abusing you, on any level, in any manner ... I want you to listen up.   If you are staying with someone who is verbally and/or physically abusing you --  GET THE HELL AWAY FROM THEM!   NOW! Allowing someone to use you for a punching bag is NOT Love!  It is fear!  And fear & Love cannot reside in the same space at the same exact time! If they are abusing you -- they do NOT love you!    If they loved you -- ...